Digging deep for joy

I have been spending time in my garden every day since this second lockdown began. My decision to embark on this activity came from sitting on the decking in a largely melancholy mood. I watched the heavy Autumnal sun break through the grey scattered sky. The warmth seemingly broke through all my layers of self-preservation that I have formed over this pandemic. Tears fell into my now tepid cup of tea, then suddenly I felt my melancholy melt away as I realised the Lord was with me.

I had forgotten how much being outside had such a positive affect on me. Somehow through these times I had stopped praying outside. I guess it is because the only places I have been recently is at my desk, in church, or in a supermarket. Somehow on this chilly sun-soaked afternoon I felt I had found a way of distracting myself when everything felt overwhelming and  joy was sparse. 

So I’m eight days in and my most recent activity in the garden was putting in a small pond. I had no experience of how to do this but I thought I would give it a go. So there I was with a pond liner, a spade, and a little bit of determination. I was excited as I neatly excavated the lawn in sensible pieces (just in case it did turn out to be a terrible idea), and so the digging began. I was making progress, and then there were roots from various bushes. Then as I plunged the spade in I hit something hard. Scraping the mud away I saw that it was a large stone. Combined with the roots and now the stone I started to get a feeling that perhaps this was a bad idea. I toyed with the idea of giving up and that melancholy mood threatened to creep in. However, I kept going and removed the stone, worked around the root, put in the liner, filled it with water, and all of a sudden I had a pond!

I had a thought as I was digging that our experience of this pandemic was similar to my pond building. At first many were energised and raring to go in the first lockdown, motivation was high and so was hope. As we got deeper there were stones and roots, patience became thinner and at the beginning of this lockdown I like many wondered if there was an end in sight. This is a bad analogy perhaps, but I realised that I had to keep going when making the pond, and what I’m saying today is that when we find it hard to find motivation, hope, compassion, and love; our Lord Jesus Christ is there to listen to us and to give us the peace and strength we need.

I do not think that Gardener’s World will be hurrying down to take photos of my little pond. However, it is a sign to me that Jesus is with us through all of these troubling days. I am reminded that Jesus promises that sorrow will turn into joy. Jesus spoke of such whilst talking to his disciples before the crucifixion, he says, “..you have pain now; but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you.” (John 16:22)

Through all of this, no one can take away the joy of being disciples of Jesus; not the churches being closed, or the lack of the Eucharist, not seeing our friends, our partners, our families, none of this, and no-one can take the joy of love from us, for God is love, and His love is dug deep inside of us.